GENRE: Gay / Bisexual Young Adult Romance
LENGTH: 35,676 words
RATING:

A teen life full of partying, girls, booze, and drugs sounds like the perfect life for Matthew, the local football hero. With his soulmate Sarah and Johnno, his partner in crime, Matthew is on top of the world.

But in a small town, where difference is looked down upon and all who don’t fit the mold are shunned, Matthew begins to understand his inner feelings aren’t what is being outwardly expressed. What if he isn’t what the town tells him he should be? If anyone finds out, will they break him? Or will Matthew be able to break through?

EXCERPT:

I felt two hands creep beneath my arms and circle around my body. “Help me,” the sweet voice whispered. I looked to my left and saw the beautiful long brown hair cascading over my shoulder. I followed the hair and across the smooth, soft skin until I reached the innocent green eyes that only spoke of purity. It was Sarah.

Sarah, my ex-girlfriend, my neighbor from down the street, and probably my closest friend in the world. We shared everything together and we knew everything about each other, both physically and mentally. We had been friends since birth and last year we dated for the whole year. Reasons for our break up were still unknown to both of us, because back then I didn’t know that I was ... Anyway, according to the town, Sarah was still seen as my girl. She was one of the very few girls that Johnno had never made a move on, because we’re mates!

“Why, what’s wrong?” I laughed, knowing that there was no fear in her voice.

“Ian Thomas is trying to crack onto me,” she spat out. “When I told him that you and I weren’t together, he started putting his arm around me and tried to grope me and stuff.”

“So, what do you want me to do about it?” I asked.

“Protect me,” she paused, then whispered, “do you want to go for a walk or something?” Her tone of voice had moved from being playful to seductive.

I knew what these little walks of hers usually led to, but I wasn’t in the mood to hang around with a bunch of drunks, so I agreed. We walked around the back of the shed, jumped the fence and walked onto the road. The road led down to the small, winding river, which ran through the town.

As we walked, Sarah placed her arm around my waist and mine around hers. Her head fell sleepily on my shoulder. I loved her, she was my friend. We stopped at the boat wharf on the river. Well, it was an opening among the trees and bushes, where a few pieces of wood had been laid down so that boats could be wheeled in and out of the water. The wharf was a place where we would go fishing and swimming when we were younger. Now we used it to launch Johnno’s boat, from there we wreaked havoc along the town’s waterway.

There was a three-quarter-moon tonight, and its reflection illuminated the water. The occasional sound of a jumping fish, and the noise of the party lingered in the background. The wind was still. We both stood there in silence.

She slowly moved forward and placed her hands on my waist, accidentally pressing on my bruise.

“Arr,” I quietly hissed.

“What’s wrong,” she asked innocently.

“I’ve got a bruise there from the game today.”

“Let me make it better,” she whispered into my ear. She slid my jumper and T-shirt up to my armpit, exposing my bruise to the night air. She bent down. Slowly and delicately, she began to kiss my skin with her soft lips. I backed away and pulled my clothes down.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, I’m just not in the mood, that’s all.”

“You never seem to be in the mood anymore. It’s been eight months since we broke up and you push me away at every chance. What’s going on?”

“I don’t know, I just don’t feel like it.”

There was a silent pause.

She stepped closer once again, this time placing her arms around my neck. She looked straight into my eyes, “I want to make love to you.”

“No, I’m not ready.”

“Come on,” she hissed, “We have to be the only two fucking virgins left in our year.” She let go and stepped away. “The whole school thinks that we spent all of last year fucking each other’s brains out.”

“For God’s sake, Sarah, you’re only sixteen ... Anyway, you’re not with me anymore, you can go and sleep with anyone you want.”

“But I want you,” she sighed.

“I’m sorry.” How could I tell her?

I stroked her face with my hand, I knew she liked that. She gazed up into my eyes again.

“I guess I can wait.” She leaned forward and kissed me.

I shut my eyes and thought of Johnno.